Out of It Then In Again

A collection of abstract narratives and retellings of events centered on family, health cycles, and finding the will to stay creative when despair overshadows one's life--set in 2021-2023.

Reflection on despair despair despair despair despair despair despair despair despair despair, rising and falling--the byproduct of getting it out of my system--to be alone with my thoughts is analogous to torture. Life is the way it is. Uncertainty does not go away. I hope that I’m not lying when I say I’m coping.

An 80 page collection of multimedia autobiographical comics from 2021-2023. Contains two comics previously published online and three new book-exclusive comics. Evocative imagery captures the bleak loneliness of adjusting to pandemic living. By dredging up difficult feelings about one's relationship with the world and the people nearest by, the value of creativity is tested. 

"This work is honest, raw, and brutal. Azar tore out his heart and smeared it on the pages. They're heavy with blood." -if I do say so myself

"I also hate my dad" -anonymous Ohio resident

This book is intended for older audiences: it contains nonsexual nudity, body horror, bloody imagery, and heavy themes. If you liked Junji Ito's Shiver, Kabi Nagata's My Lesbian Experience With Loneliness, or Lynda Barry's One! Hundred! Demons!, you'll enjoy this!

A pdf and an epub of the book are available, formatted as double page spreads. 

Self published with Strange Deer Press, a comic and zine collective.